Sprigs of Grass

Well, I can't stress the annoyance of me trying to get to the right site so I can edit my own blog.....Often times the dang labels are in German and in different places, (especially if it is in Kuwait mode because things are aligned on the right side instead of the left), so I end up just picking things and hope to arrive to this page so I can update this thing.

The title of the post eludes to my ESPN blog that was sent as an email to a reporter that I have known for a long time, since middle school. My PA, Major Baumgartner made fun of me because I said there was "Sprigs of Grass". He said he didn't appreciate 1) that the article called him a Physician's Assistant, (apparently in the PA world being called a Physician's Assistant vs. Physician Assistant is REALLY offensive. Personally, I have no idea what the difference is but I don't tell him that. Also, in the original email I referred to him as a PA and the reporter spelled it out incorrectly), and 2) he was offended by my attempt at "poetry" by using the phrase sprig of grass. He has a very dry and quirky sense of humor.

Anyway, We are heading into the half way point here at Shank and I will say that I am in need of my mid-tour leave. The monotony gets to you. Shift work is very monotonous and although it makes the days go by fast the routine drives me nuts. I have realized that I like changing routine if that makes sense. I get antsy towards the end of a month because I want to change shifts. It annoys me that one month I won't eat breakfast and one month I won't eat dinner. MAJ B is totally opposite. Everyday no matter what shift he is on, he comes in makes him some oatmeal, makes coffee, and watches one hour of a show and then goes to work. He is also studying for the MCAT so routine is beneficial for that. It is weird to think that I was studying for the MCAT 7 years ago!

The weather here very nice. It can get really dusty but there is enough rain peppered in here and there to keep it bearable. I love when it rains because you can actually smell the humidity which I miss. Easter came and went. Holidays slide by and would easily be missed if it weren't for the elaborate decorations that our chow hall puts up. Easter morning, I walked in the chow hall for breakfast and was greated by Jesus. Yes, Jesus. There was a life size Jesus standing there greeting me with arms open. As I looked closer, I reached out touched his chin and realized that it was Butter! You can imagine how much delight this brought me. It made my whole day! I took pictures with Butter Jesus and also was surprised that there was Mary made of Margarine. This produced such blasphemous comments as "I can't believe it's not Butter.....Jesus", or "Our Lard and Savior" , or Mary Margarine. But it was hilarious! Someone, in charge of the chow hall thought, "I know, let's have a life size Jesus made out of Butter for Easter!!!!" and then someone else said, "Yeah! that would be fantastic!", and then they went to the efforts of finding some skilled soul to be commissioned to do this task. Who is this prodigy, this master of condiments, this Butter master?

Moving on, I have also turned my tent room into the best room on the FOB. I tasked some skilled men to extend my room and then make a king size bed! I guarantee that no one has such a set up! You may ask yourself Why? And I answer.....Why not? I like to reflect to the man who first climbed Mt. Everest.....When asked why he wanted to do such a dangerous task, he responded "Because it's there", (Thanks Coach Coale for embedded quotes in my head that I can use in blogs). So I must answer with a similar answer, "Because I had room". I have bedding for it now, lights, and still have room for my comfy papasan and dresser. I am pretty much awesome.

ramblings

So....I have now made my room to be a clash of cheep oriental rugs, army camouflage poncho liners, multi-colored christmas lights and yoda lights, and one big teal comfy chair. It is not my best showing for decor but it is pretty good considering. I decided to lure help in and now my entire room is blocked off from the sunlight and my neighbors. Just imagine a big tent partitioned with cheap plywood and 2x4s. I could literally sit up in my top bunk and look over into my next door neighbor....which could be cause for some awkward moments. Therefore, I lured a few men to help me build up my walls, extend my room, and block out the door light. It is awesome. I was tired being in the girl tent with no new accommodations while all the guys built theirs up to be magical.

We have been trudging away over here and FOB Shank is ever-changing and ever-expanding. We had a fixed wing land here the other day which was a new thing since we have been constructing a longer runway. (We, as in the engineers). A fixed wing, a.k.a normal airplane not helicopter. New Brigades and Battalions move in and out all the time. New special forces groups exchange as well. I can always tell because all of the sudden their are new hairy overgrown men around. Apparently, if you are in special forces the goal is to look as unkempt as possible. "Hey! let's not shower" may be a motto. In our BTN, we have changes as well. New Company commanders move in, and others out. Careers progress or digress even in the deployed setting. One of my favorite Captains is moving to be a commander for a company in another Task Force. It is sucky for us but good for him. People are leaving for R&R and gone for about a month at a time. When I leave they will bring another MD to replace me for the time that I am gone. We are one aspect of the Task Force that you can not go shorthanded.

Being in aviation, our job is to support all of these new groups coming in and adapt to their goals and objectives. This is difficult because we get set working with one group one way and then when they leave we must adjust and change how we work with a new group. This affects me as well since some groups like for the docs to fly on missions and others don't. This is all separate from MEDEVAC which is another added component.

The pictures added are of a leadership training exercise in which we incorporate weapon training, with PT, and medical. So we literally put on all our gear, (body army, helmet, and ammo), ran up pretty much the steepest hill imaginable, ran down the hill and immediately started punching a bag for 2 minutes and then turned and shot our weapons on the range. After that we trudged over to the medical portion where you ran up the hill again, (or do some other ridiculous task like hit a pile of dirt with a sledge hammer), and give someone an IV and nasopharyngeal, (see prior post for vid). It is actually very good training and is meant to mimic action in theatre.

The picture of the guy getting the NPA, (tan brawler shirt) is my BTN Commander. He reminds me of the character from Dodge ball that Ben Stiller plays. Mainly in the ridiculous nature he works out. I was walking to chow one evening, it was snowing heavily during dusk time, and all of the sudden I heard some grunting and pounding noises. I look to my left and outside on the deck platform I see a man in short sleeves, swinging a huge sledgehammer at a huge stationary tractor tire. I literally paused, mouth gaping, and then shook my head and proceeded to chow. A part of me wanted to run up and start kicking the tire or slap an inanimate object in order to participate but then my rational side decided against it. I feel like I got a taste of crazy with my strength and conditioning coach at OU that will probably last me a lifetime......Thanks Robin.

Oh, PS, in the helicopter pic I am in the bird with my feet hanging out on the left.

down time

The last couple of days have been pretty bad weather with it raining, sleeting, or snowing. This has lended to some down time which is good of course because no one is flying or getting hurt but makes everyone a little antsy. Take my XO for example.....He decided that instead of having our weekly staff meeting, we would instead give each other IVs and stick tubes down each other's noses. This of course following a "hasty" demonstration and instruction via me. This went decently well considering that we had 10 non-medical people jamming sharp objects into arms and ramming lubricated plastic tubes in nostrils. One guy almost passed out.....almost. Restlessness is not good with a bunch of 20 year olds....I had to tell a private to get off the large storage container, (about a story high)....I then had to yell as he turned to jump off the top instead of using the obvious latter on the other side! These guys are amazing at making bad decisions. I am not exempt of course, ( I have had my string of bad decisions as some of you may know), I have a huge bruise on my right hip after being rammed into the wall during a very physical game of nerf basketball in a companies head quarters at 1AM. (I am sure this blog will be followed by emails and reminders via my mother and father to quit being risky with my health). I also have been caught up in some extensive snow ball fights involving both the Apache pilots and the Blackhawk pilots. I was so involved, I had to change my clothes after these fights, not because I was soaked from the snow but because I had sweat through my uniform. Let's just say that it involved some covert actions and hiding/sneaking up on people. Now, if it has snowed, I have to keep a look out while in transit from one place to another. I have made many enemies.

As for other things.....I finally got my kinetic watch in the mail. Why did you buy this you ask? Well, I thought I was genius for buying a solar powered watch prior to deploying. This would have been a good idea except for the minor detail that I work nights! I literally would walk around with a watch on my wrist with a blank face. It was that or I would have it on our deck charging half of the time. This kinetic watch charges by movement.....much better. I also am waiting for new sunglasses. The ones I have fall off my face! Also very annoying.

The pictures are random...One is of me getting my flight physical, (the hearing test, depth perception test, all at once) One is of all the people in my aid station during christmas, and the other of a snow ball fight.

Ghazni vacation

Currently, I am residing in a little Polish FOB in Ghazni which is south of Shank. We have a MEDEVAC component here that TF BRAWLER supplies. All the MEDEVAC people rotate down here for 2 wks at a time and I really wanted to see it. I had my first day off coming up this week since we are changing shifts so I thought maybe this would be a good, maybe only, opportunity for me to get down here and see Ghazni. It is nice because it is a smaller FOB, I have my own room, and you have a lot of time to just relax. On the downside, you are always on MEDEVAC call but it is slow right now. It is also nice because there is no leadership here and if I want to go to the latrine in flip flops I can. (Usually, I have to wear full uniform/PT uniform to go anywhere. It's little things like that which is nice to have a break from. Also, I like the MEDEVAC guys and just like to BS with them. I have had more sleep here then I have in a long time. Yesterday, I went to the "bizarre" which is just a little area of shacks filled with venders. I met the smallest man I have ever seen at the bizzare. He makes Warwick Davis a.k.a Willow look like a tall fellow. I was really excited to see him but then when it came to getting a picture I was hesitant. Mainly, because I felt like we were making a spectacle of him. But I went in to his shop and he pulled out a chair for me and posed for a picture without me asking. I bought a few things from him including some hand painted pictures which are beautiful. My guilt was lessened as well when group of Polish guys walked over to him and just picked him up and took pictures with him. He had beautiful blue eyes. I go back tomorrow to Shank and will be on my midnight to noon shift. It is more conducive to skype and getting things done. Although, you are off schedule with everyone else. The change up is welcome.

As for my birthday, it was really not bad. It was as good as one could be in Afghanistan. Thank you to all of you for the care packages, cards, and well wishes. I truly am blessed.

Long haul

So it is 2010! Which in my mind means this is going to be a great year since it is my luck number. I also have a birthday fast approaching which I like to express, I'm so sexy I'm so fine, I will soon be 29. (This is stolen from being in high school and graduating in 1999). I think everyone is having a slow recovery from the holidays and settling into the long haul which will most likely be the original 12 months extended to at lease 13 maybe 14 mos. It was to be expected. We are seeing new faces everyday. New units are filtering in, Engineers, Special Forces, etc etc. I keep asking myself if the engineer units try to be douchers or does it just come naturally. I think we all were spoiled having this area to ourselves and now that all these strangers are impinging on our territory it is annoying. They are in our gym, our chow hall, and computer tent. They have terrible gym etiquette, (which I have now settled with myself that I am a workout snob. Not in the type of gym because I like dirty, sweat boxes just fine, but a snob in how you arrange the weights, putting up weights, and resting on the equipment).

A few days ago, I got to volunteer for the Hoist training with the MEDEVAC. That means I was hooked up to a rope and sat on a metal platform/anchor looking thing, and rode up 25ft or so with a medic into a hovering helicopter. It was pretty cool.

Thank you for all the letters, gifts, and thoughts. I appreciate every little thing...down to the 25 year old wash rag that mom felt was essential that I have.

Posted are some pictures of my clinic status post poster decorations compliments of Becky Hill and some pretty pictures of sunset at Shank.

Post-Christmas

It is the 26th and all is well. Even in a deployed setting, you are exhausted after Christmas. With all the hustle and bustle with 2 church services, the Brigade Commander visiting, and having a mini-Christmas party with Nasty Santa game, (Dirty Santa if you will, My PA decided he was going to call it Nasty Santa instead). We saved up all our treats that everyone sent, especially the homemade ones, and defrosted them for our party. Christmas in a deployed setting is definately different. Number one: I still was working and I was still on call for Medevac. Number two: No mimosas or bloody mary's on Christmas morn. Number three: the Candlelight service for Christmas Eve was actually a Chemlight service which didn't quite work out. Coordinating the breaking of Chemlights doesn't quite work out. Number four: I didn't pass out around 3pm from all the wine and turkey. Number five: No family, kids, or bird dogs running around was definitely missed. I did watch "Scrooge" my favorite Christmas movie and enjoyed it as always. I want to thank all of you who sent care packages for Christmas. I enjoyed everything and distributed a lot of stuff that I had excess, (the 12 jars of Peanut Butter was one of those things in which I couldn't justify to myself for keeping all of them....Thank-you Mayhues!).

(The following paragraph may not be for kids).

Probably the low point of the day was when my company commander came to the aid station with gifts for all the single soldiers.....Yeah! I got two Army socks stuffed with girly things like deodorant, tampons, summer's eve wipes, and of all things petroleum jelly. I really don't know what these people were thinking when stuffing this stuff in the socks. I mean are they telling us that the reason we are single is that we lack hygiene? And I don't even want to touch the reason they gave us petroleum jelly. It was extremely weird.

(It's okay for kids now)

So now, we recover from Christmas. I soon will be 29. I love and miss all of you. Just know that I am doing well, getting to know more and more people everyday. I believe in what we are doing here. I love MEDEVAC. I am in an environment in which I can be myself and also have room to learn and develop both as a physician and as a person.

P.S. the pictures are of my office status post Christmas cards and gifts and my dorm room.

care packages, condiments, coffee

I awoke this evening 11:30 PM to get ready for work. I usually get up early and go work out prior to work but I really was in need of a full 8 hours of sleep. The day prior I only had about 4 hrs of sleep due to me not going to bed until 3:30 PM and then having choir/band practice at 8 PM. Why, do you ask, did I stay up until 3:30 PM? Well, that is because I received a ton of care packages including some of the 14 boxes Ada High School sent. I had to go through the boxes, see what they contained and then distribute the items as needed. Honestly, I did that for a while and then my head medic took over. The mass care packages are overwhelming honestly. Especially when our mail was backed up for weeks and now we are getting everything all at once. I have never seen more beef jerky, random magazines, candy, and breath mints in my life! (Apparently, everyone believes that while you are deployed you will automatically have halitosis). I just got my uniquely stuffed box from my mother from 17 Nov. just yesterday. It contained a trash bag, that when opened revealed 6 or so mini loafs of homemade bread that was not, I'm afraid, safe to eat. The padding that my mother chose to use was a mixture of peanuts in the shell and Splenda packets. This, while a interesting choice of padding, was genius because I asked both for nuts and Splenda packets and did not specify how I wanted to receive them. (Mother, do not get offended by this story. It is awesome.) Cookies, I have found. keep wonderfully and for those of you who baked me some, they are delicious.

I have enjoyed all of your gifts and currently have a real mini christmas tree, Yoda lights in my office and in my room, a Willow movie figurine, a close up face mirror, new blush and eyeliner, (for church), a self warming vest, and a pair of dreidels. This is just a sample. For all of you who wrapped your gifts, I kept them for Christmas. With the exception of Aunt Vicki's large box in which I unconsciously ignored the obvious gift sacs and opened every thing in the box. ( I can only attribute these actions to the fact that it was the end of my shift and on the top of the box was the Yoda lights. I got all excited like JoJo the idiot circus boy with a pretty new pet and opened everything. The moral of the story is this: Don't allow me to make decisions on my own. If you want me to wait on gifts you must place a card inside the box, on top of the items, explicitly directing me what I can open. Therefore, leaving no choices up to me.)

As for the other items listed in the "title" line. This morning at about 1AM when I was eating breakfast, I looked down at what I was eating and was a tad disturbed. My breakfast consisted of more condiments then actual food. I have chosen to be on the South Beach Diet Phase 1 which is pretty strict with no carbs. Therefore, my breakfast was a salad with lettuce, tuna, tomatoes, and cucumbers. I had then topped it with mixture of fat free italian dressing, Caesar dressing, and taco sauce. On the side I chose to be classy and go for the green olives and pickles combo in which I dip into ketchup. My drink to go with this fantastic meal was coffee, a tropical blend, in which I like to use Splenda and some sort of peppermint flavoring. It sounds divine, I know.

P.S. MAJ Baumgartner really loves my care packages as well.....